Tag Archive | grief support

What To Do When You Can’t Take Anymore

Everybody goes through heartache and discouragement … but what do you do when your heartache is so deep, it feels as though you may drown in your tears and despair?

I’ve been there. My grief ran extremely deep. I felt like I was dead but couldn’t die…crying was physically painful because my eyelids were so tender and raw. I felt as though I couldn’t catch my breath.

If you’re at that very tough place right now, it’s very important to know: there is hope.

If today your broken heart is crying out, “I can’t do this anymore”…

…that’s a signal.

It’s a signal to place all of the broken pieces of your heart into God’s more than capable hands.

Something to always remember: when we feel we can’t go on…GOD CAN & WILL CARRY US! He can comfort and heal a broken heart more in one moment than we could ever hope to do in a lifetime.

As we walk through our pain, God will be right beside us. He is faithful to carry us in those heart-wrenching times.

When we give God each shattered piece of our heart, He can take the broken pieces and lovingly rebuild each piece back together – and eventually create something of great value.

Our heart won’t be the same. Instead, it will have new space to hold more depth, compassion, wisdom, and much more understanding about life due to experiencing deep grief.

And there will be pain in the process…but as Pastor Rick Warren always says, “God never wastes a hurt.”

Having been through multiple grief experiences, I have found this to be more than true.

So if you are deep in heartache or discouragement today…ask God to come in and help you.

You couldn’t ask for a better Companion throughout your grief.

He truly is a Faithful Friend – and He’s always there 24/7.

God loves you…He cares for you…and He can genuinely relate to your pain.

God sees every chapter of your life – start to finish.

I promise you: God is not through with you. He will NEVER leave you or forsake you.

You may be in the worst chapter of your life…but it won’t always be like this…and you have better days to come in the upcoming chapters. With God, some of your very best days may not have even happened yet.

Hold onto hope!

TRUST God.

Feel what you need to feel.

Always remember God loves you more than anyone ever has…and He loves you more than anyone ever will.

God’s heart is good and He is FOR you!

So run to His heart and trust Him when you feel like you can’t take anymore.

No matter the grief…no matter the situation…He is always waiting for you with open arms.❤️

Looking for true peace? Whatever you’re going through, God knows—and cares. Find real hope today.

Psalms‬ ‭27:13-14‬, “I would have despaired unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD In the land of the living. Wait for the LORD; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the LORD.”

Isaiah 66:9, “I will not cause pain without allowing something new to be born, says the Lord.”

Philippians 1:6, “For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.”

Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a futire.”

Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.”

Deuteronomy 31:6, “So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the LORD your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.”

Ephesians 3:20, “Glory belongs to God, whose power is at work in us. By this power he can do infinitely more than we can ask or imagine.”

©2021 Kim Niles/Grief Bites. All rights reserved.

❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

⭐️For more encouragement:

❤️Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s $3.19 book): https://www.christianbook.com/getting-knocks-transparent-journey-seeking-through/k-b-h-niles/

❤️Connect on Facebook by “liking” page: https://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

❤️Kim’s blog: https://www.griefbites.com

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

1. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships

2. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed

3. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites

4. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays

5. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Christmas: http://bible.com/r/3V5

6. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Happy New Year!: http://bible.com/r/3Zv

7. Valentine’s Day: Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/14059-valentines-day-experiencing-holidays-with-jesus

⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is copyright protected material. Please ask for permission to copy, use, or print.

⭐️⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is for encouragement purposes only and is not in any way to be construed as medical, emotional, mental, relational, or psychological advice. We hope to serve as a bridge to encourage others by sharing our personal grief and life experiences. Please contact a qualified healthcare professional, mental health professional, or qualified pastor for guidance and advice.

Are you hurting? Feel like giving up? Please read this.

Today, somebody is wondering how they’re going to get through what they’re going through. They’re in so much pain, and they genuinely have no idea if life will ever get better.

The pain in their heart is deep…they may feel as though grief or an extremely tough situation is attempting to steal their heart & breath…and they desperately need hope breathed back into their soul. They need to be encouraged and loved back to life.

Perhaps you are deeply mourning a treasured loved one…or you’re going through a heartbreaking divorce or separation. Maybe you’re in the midst of freshly finding out your spouse committed adultery…or you found out awhile back and they haven’t cared enough to invest time in healing your heart and marriage. Perhaps you or a loved one received devastating medical news…or maybe you’ve battled illness for years and your heart and body are frustrated and exhausted. Or you’re experiencing marital or family conflict…or estrangement. Maybe the pandemic has been extremely costly and you feel alone – you’re experiencing terrible financial issues. Perhaps you or a loved one have COVID-19 right now, or you’ve had it and you just aren’t feeling better. Maybe you’ve been rejected, betrayed, abandoned, or you feel unloved or unimportant – by those who should’ve had your back (and your heart) – especially during grief or a life challenge. You (or a loved one) may be battling addiction, and your heart is absolutely miserable and weary. Maybe “life” continues to be one big disappointment, hurt, or letdown…one after another…and you feel defeated – perhaps even bitter.

There are so many reasons we can feel hopeless — or like all is lost…

…but I want you to know there is hope.

Whatever you are going through, God truly understands the devastation…the deep heartache…the excruciating pain in your soul…the tears that have fallen from your eyes…the trauma from the life event that is keeping you up at night.

If this is you, please know there is a God who deeply cares. He sees your tears…He understands your deep heartache…He knows your entire grief event or tough situation from beginning to end. And He already knows how He is going to help (and deliver) you through this hard place.

God will not leave you…He will not abandon you…He will not leave you where you are at.

Take time right now to share your heart with God. Tell Him all about your grief and situation…even the hard stuff…especially the hard stuff. Ask Him for the comfort, love, encouragement, healing, and help you are needing.

Just like a good father would never turn their back on their children when they plead for help, God will never turn His back on His children either.

It won’t always be like this.

The pain and heartache won’t always be this intense.

You are valuable.

You have purpose.

You are extravagantly loved.

In Him, you have everything your hurting heart needs.

Please hang in there and remember this very important truth; Your best days may not have even happened yet. It may not be the life you once knew and enjoyed…but when we give God all of the shattered pieces of our heart and life, He can truly create something new out of our pain – when we trust Him.

So please do not quit.

Not today.

Not tonight.

Not a week from now.

Not a month from now.

Not a year from now.

Not ever.

Run to Abba Father’s heart, love Him, trust Him, and allow Him to love you back to life. Ask Him to breathe new hope into you.

Thank Him for what He’s about to do in your life and heart.

There will be tough days ahead…but God will be with you every step of the way.

I can promise you this: even when our life/situation isn’t good…God still is.

With God, we ALWAYS have hope!

When you can’t see or trust God’s plans…or even agree with His plans…trust His heart. God is always up to something good.

God truly does care and He has a very good plan for your life! Ask Him right now to begin revealing to your heart His great plans for you.💗

PS – Periodically ask your loved ones if they’re ok. This year has been so very challenging and hard for so many. Anytime you have an opportunity to care for, love, or encourage family and friends, please do so. Just like your loved ones may not realize what you’re going through, you never know what battles they’re facing, fighting, or going through as well. Always choose to be the rare treasure who actively cares.💞

May God bless, keep, heal, and help all of you and your loved ones!

Kim

©2020 Kim Niles/Grief Bites. All rights reserved.

❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

⭐️For more encouragement:

🙏🏻Making peace with God: http://www.peacewithgod.net

🎄Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s book): https://www.christianbook.com/getting-knocks-transparent-journey-seeking-through/k-b-h-niles/

❤️Connect on Facebook by “liking” page: https://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

🎄Kim’s blog: https://www.griefbites.com

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

1. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships

2. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed

3. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites

4. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays

5. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Christmas: http://bible.com/r/3V5

6. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Happy New Year!: http://bible.com/r/3Zv

7. Valentine’s Day: Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/14059-valentines-day-experiencing-holidays-with-jesus

⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is copyright protected material. Please ask for permission to copy, use, or print.

⭐️⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is for encouragement purposes only and is not in any way to be construed as medical, emotional, mental, relational, or psychological advice. We hope to serve as a bridge to encourage others by sharing our personal grief and life experiences. Please contact a qualified healthcare professional, mental health professional, or qualified pastor for guidance and advice.

How To Build A Hedge Around An Unfaithful Partner

In my grief ministry, there are so many who reach out and desperately need help, encouragement, and hope in the areas of marriage and adultery.

I will be writing a series of blog posts on these topics starting today.

I deeply understand the heartache of marriage issues. I, myself, have been through harrowing, heartbreaking, and stressful times in my own marriage. I hope my (and my husband’s) experiences will truly help others.

We almost lost our marriage in 2008. I remember how excruciatingly painful it was to walk through those very tough days.

I appreciate my husband being willing to give his permission to talk about our marriage…God did an amazing work in our relationship and brought much good out of our pain. My husband rededicated his life to the Lord due to that tough time — and out of that very painful time, we became marriage coaches through our church. We’ve coached dozens of other hurting marriages with the insights we gained through our own experiences in 2008. Due to God’s mercy, grace and goodness, we have a 90% success rate in helping couples to heal their marriages.

Today’s blog post is an excellent resource! I used this information as a starting base to save my own marriage.

If you are going through the painful experience of a disconnected or adulterous spouse, you will certainly appreciate this information.

Stay tuned…I will be writing many blog posts in the upcoming weeks on the topic of marriage — and how to save or greatly enrich a marriage.

Take care and know that with God, there is HOPE! The Lord can do more in a moment than we could ever hope to do in a lifetime. God loves you and He is very faithful!❤️

HOW TO BUILD A HEDGE AROUND AN UNFAITHFUL PARTNER

“I SOUGHT FOR A MAN AMONG THEM THAT SHOULD MAKE UP THE HEDGE…THAT I SHOULD NOT DESTROY…” (EZ.22:30)

A certain man discovered that his wife was secretly seeing another man. She would meet him on business trips and spend long hours after work with him. For months she had neglected her home responsibilities.

He learned about the “hedge of thorns” that he could claim in prayer for his wife, and one day he used it. That evening when he got home from work, his wife was in the kitchen making their first meal in four months!

A wife learned that her husband was spending time with a younger woman. She learned further that he was planning to leave her and marry this younger woman. She was told how to pray for a “hedge of thorns” around her husband. The next evening he received a phone call from the young woman telling him that she wanted to break off their relationship.

The wife of a young pastor left him and began working in a bar. She was planning to marry the barkeeper. The grieving husband learned how to pray for a “hedge of thorns” around his wife, and three days later, his wife called him up and was ready to return home.

These are only a few of the many illustrations which Christians are experiencing as a result of building a “hedge of thorns” or “hedge of protection” around their loved ones. However, there is far more to the story than just praying a certain prayer.

The Scriptural basis for the “hedge of thorns” is found in several passages. First of all, God looks for an intercessor to make up a “hedge” of protection. (Ez.22:30). Job is an example of such a man in the O.T. (Job 1:5-12)

He prayed for God’s protection over his family – including his sons and daughters whom he feared cursed God in their hearts. The result was that God “made an hedge about him, and about his house, and about all that He had on every side”.

By building a “hedge” around an unfaithful partner, his/her “lovers” lose interest and Satan is no more able to take your partner captive “at his will”. Satan must get clearance from God for whatever he does, and his actions become God’s dealings in love. II Timothy 2:25-26; II Corinthians 12:7; Job 1:5-10)

A further illustration of the hedge is found in Hosea. God promised to make a hedge of thorns around Hosea’s adulterous wife so that her lovers would lose interest in her. (Hosea 2:6-7)

After God built a hedge of thorns around Hosea’s unfaithful wife, and her lovers left her, she decided to return to her husband. However, if she was to remain under his authority and protection, there were several things that he had to do. These are listed in Hosea 2:14-16.

The NT counterpart to this truth is illustrated in Christ’s interecession for Peter (Lk.22:31-38) and for his disciples (John 17:12 – the hedge of prayer – none lost but the son of perdition). It is also illustrated in Paul’s prayer for those under his spiritual care.

The basic teaching of Scripture on the hedge is found in II Cor. 10:4-5 “For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds.”

This emphasizes the fact that Satan is able to have powerful holds on our mind, will, and emotions, but that through God we can and must pull them down.

The purpose of “binding Satan” (Matt.12:29) and building a “hedge of protection” around your partner is so that you can proceed “casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.”

(II Cor.10:5).

There are a number of cases in which a husband or wife build a “hedge of thorns” around an unfaithful partner through prayer, saw the return of that partner, and then failed to follow up on the victory. Soon Satan regained a foothold in that partner’s life. Thus, the following steps are very essential.

1. MAKE SURE THAT YOU ARE A GENUINE CHRISTIAN.

God only hears the prayers of His own children. We become a child of God only through putting our full faith and trust for salvation in the finished work of the Lord Jesus Christ, in dying for us and being raised from the dead.

“Not by works of righteousness which we have done, but according to His mercy He saved us…” (Titus 3:5).

“But God commendeth His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:8)

“If thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.” (Romans 10:9)

For more information: http://www.peacewithGod.net

2. CLEANSE YOUR LIFE OF ALL SIN

God delighted in building a hedge of protection around Job and all his family and possessions, because Job was “a perfect and an unpright man, one that feareth God, and…(hateth) evil,”(Job 1:8)

We can claim the righteousness of Christ as Christians by confessing our sins and cleansing our mind, life, and home of anything that grieves the Spirit of God and hinders His work in our life. “…Make not provision for the flesh, to fulfill the lusts thereof.” (Romans 13:14)

3. BUILD A “HEDGE OF THORNS” BY PRAYER

The following prayer is an example of building a hedge of thorns around an unfaithful marriage partner:

“Heavenly Father, I ask You in the name and through the blood of the Lord Jesus Christ, to build a “hedge of thorns” around my partner. I pray that through this hedge, any other lover will lose interest and depart. I base this prayer on Your Word which commands that what You have joined together, let not man put asunder.” (Matthew 19:6)

4. RESTORE A SPIRIT OF ONENESS

Follow through on your prayer by getting alone with your partner (…”I will allure her and bring her into the wilderness..”), using gentle, kind, and loving words (“…speak comfortably unto her…”_, committing yourself to your partner’s needs and visualizing hope (“I will give her her vineyards…for a door of hope”), restoring your partner’s happiness (“…and she shall sing there, as in the days of her youth…”), and restoring a spirit of deep friendship (“…thou shalt call me ish (my husband) and shalt call me no more baali (my lord)). (Hosea 2:14-16)

5. CAST DOWN WRONG REASONINGS

In the spirit of friendship and fellowship, cast down false reasonings in the mind of your partner by wisely using God’s Word. Together, bring every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ. (I Cor. 10:4-5)

GOMER

Gomer was the wife of the prophet Hosea.

She was an adulterous wife.

In this account, God gives us a graphic illustration of how the “hedge of thorns” works

Hosea 2:6-16

WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU PUT A “HEDGE OF THORNS” AROUND AN UNFAITHFUL PARTNER?

1. He/she will lose direction.

“…I will hedge up thy way with thorns, and make a wall, that she shall not find her paths.”

2. Any other “lovers” will leave.

“…she shall follow after her lovers, but she shall not overtake them; and she shall seek them, but shall not find them.”

3. Troubles will prompt a return

“…then shall she say, I will go and return to my first husband: for then was it better with me than now.”

Hosea 2:6-16

⭐️A “hedge will be ineffective if you have not resolved all past offenses, or if you do not follow through with Scriptural steps of actions.

THE PRAYER FOR A “HEDGE” INVOLVES THREE PARTS

1. YOUR SPIRITUAL ‘CREDENTIALS’

We are able to approach a holy God through the righteousness of the Lord Jesus Christ. Christ’s death and resurrection have already defeated Satan’s power. “But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ.” (I Cor. 15:57)

2. YOUR REQUEST

When we pray, we must be specific; the more precise we are in our prayer, the more able we are to judge its Scriptural basis and the more alert we will be in seeing His answer to it. “…Ye have not, because ye ask not” (James 4:2)

3. YOUR SCRIPTURAL AUTHORITY

Every request must be based on the will of God as revealed in His Word. God’s Word is the sword of the Spirit (Ep.6:17). Christians are able to overcome Satan “..by the blood of the lamb and by the word of their testimony.” (Rev. 12:11).

GOD GIVES FIVE STEPS TO WIN BACK A WAYWARD PARTNER

(Hosea 2:14-16)

1. Allure him/her away from ungodly influences.

2. Speak gently and lovingly.

3. Reestablish responsibility and by it restore hope.

4. Cause him/her to sing for joy.

5. Build an intimate friendship.

From Bill Gothard Ministries

❤️

To all who are praying for God to bring healing and restoration to your marriage and family, I pray God will heal, restore, and bless you, your spouse, your marriage and your family.

Stay tuned: This next month, I will be answering a reader’s questions on adultery…will be sharing very specific, useful, and powerful prayers you can pray for your marriage and family…and will also be sharing incredibly important tips you can use to greatly improve your marriage and family relationships.

Always remember how much God loves you and your precious family! God has BIG plans for you!

Gratitude & many blessings,

Kim

©2021 Kim Niles/Grief Bites. All rights reserved.

❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

⭐️For more encouragement:

❤️Making peace with God: http://www.peacewithgod.net

❤️Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s $3.19 book): https://www.christianbook.com/getting-knocks-transparent-journey-seeking-through/k-b-h-niles/

❤️Connect on Facebook by “liking” page: https://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

❤️Kim’s blog: https://www.griefbites.com

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

1. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships

2. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed

3. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites

4. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays

5. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Christmas: http://bible.com/r/3V5

6. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Happy New Year!: http://bible.com/r/3Zv

7. Valentine’s Day: Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/14059-valentines-day-experiencing-holidays-with-jesus

⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is copyright protected material. Please ask for permission to copy, use, or print.

⭐️⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is for encouragement purposes only and is not in any way to be construed as medical, emotional, mental, relational, or psychological advice. We hope to serve as a bridge to encourage others by sharing our personal grief and life experiences. Please contact a qualified healthcare professional, mental health professional, or qualified pastor for guidance and advice.

🎄Christmas Countdown ~ December 7🎄

🎄❤️🎄Good morning!
Today, we’re on Day 7 of our Christmas Countdown. Each day in December, I’ll be posting from one of our YouVersion Christmas plans. Hope all of you have a blessed week!

🎄🦌🎄❤️🎄🦌🎄 Day 7🎄🦌🎄❤️🎄🦌🎄

Christmas is such a fun, amazing time! But due to grief, family/marital issues, financial pressures, or challenging life events, Christmas can be an extremely sad or stressful time, too.

I love Jesus for so many reasons, but one of my favorite attributes of His is that He is truly a Wonderful Counselor.

When I go through tough life events, conflict, heartache, stress, or grief, I know without a doubt He is there for me.

If you’re going through a tough situation or a heartbreaking event in life…or you have some past issues you’ve never fully resolved or dealt with…Jesus is here for you, too.

He sees what you are going through.

He deeply cares about your heart.

He truly understands.

When we struggle with life challenges, or even temptation or sin, God truly cares and empathizes with us. He holds the power to help us overcome anything we’re facing.

If you’re experiencing a hardened heart due to heartbreaking or challenging events, Jesus genuinely cares about you! He is willing to heal your heart: – the Bible says even to the point of taking away a heart of stone and replacing it with a new heart that is soft and moldable by Him.

We have a Wonderful Counselor who is caring, loving, kind, and on our side – and He is a genius at healing hearts and lives.

Place your heart and life (and your loved ones’ hearts and lives) in His more than capable hands. He can do more in a moment than we could ever hope to do in an entire lifetime.
He is truly the Wonderful Counselor who genuinely loves and cares about you and your loved ones — completely!

If you are going through a tough situation or a tough time in life, God genuinely cares. There is nobody on earth we can better seek for the love, encouragement, and help we need…God truly is there for us 24/7.

🙏🏻Pray: “Jesus, I thank You so much for caring not just about my spirit, but also about my heart, mind, will, emotions, and wellness. Please help me to be completely honest with You and myself, so I can be healed and have a vibrant and right relationship with You at all times. Reveal anything in my heart and life that is displeasing to You, and please reveal to me any area of my life that is holding me back from fully experiencing the best relationship I can have with You. I thank You for being my Wonderful Counselor, the absolute Lover of my soul! Your extravagant love and care is priceless! Please be here for me throughout this Christmas season…and for the rest of my life. I love you so much, Jesus! In Your great Name I pray, Amen!”

⭐️Activity: Today, take some time to get totally real with Jesus. Don’t hold anything back! Fully pour your heart out to Jesus. He literally bends down from Heaven to hear your prayers – all of your joys, concerns, good happenings, life challenges, struggles, hopes, dreams, and heart’s cries. Jesus is more than willing to bless you with a brand new heart and a brand new spirit, too. All you have to do is ask. He deeply loves you and cares for you. Never forget that!

❤️Read: Isaiah 9:6, Psalms 116:2, Ezekiel 36:26, Psalms 56:8, Hebrews 4:15

This devotional © 2018 by Kim Niles/Grief Bites. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️

©2020 Kim Niles/Grief Bites. All rights reserved.

❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

⭐️For more encouragement:

❤️Making peace with God: http://www.peacewithgod.net

❤️Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s book): https://www.christianbook.com/getting-knocks-transparent-journey-seeking-through/k-b-h-niles/

❤️Connect on Facebook by “liking” page: https://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

❤️Kim’s blog: https://www.griefbites.com

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

1. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships

2. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed

3. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites

4. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays

5. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Christmas: http://bible.com/r/3V5

6. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Happy New Year!: http://bible.com/r/3Zv

7. Valentine’s Day: Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/14059-valentines-day-experiencing-holidays-with-jesus

⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is copyright protected material. Please ask for permission to copy, use, or print.

⭐️⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is for encouragement purposes only and is not in any way to be construed as medical, emotional, mental, relational, or psychological advice. We hope to serve as a bridge to encourage others by sharing our personal grief and life experiences. Please contact a qualified healthcare professional, mental health professional, or qualified pastor for guidance and advice.

🎄Christmas Countdown ~ December 5🎄

🎄❤️🎄Good evening, everybody!
Today, we’re on Day 5 of our Christmas Countdown. Today’s Countdown shares one of my absolute favorite Christmas traditions.
I hope all of you are safe & well and are having a peaceful weekend.

(For those who are just joining us, each day, I’ll be daily posting from one of our YouVersion Christmas reading plans throughout December. I hope this helps each of you to feel less discouraged or alone…especially with the pandemic…and like you have a friend encouraging your heart during this very tough time of year.)

🎄🦌🎄❤️🎄🦌🎄 Day 5🎄🦌🎄❤️🎄🦌🎄

Christmas is filled with wonderful traditions.

One of my favorite traditions is when my family wears Christmas pajamas and we drive around to see Christmas lights on homes. We’ve done this every year as a family for a few decades now.

The pajamas are warm and comfy, and the Christmas music and hot chocolate are great…but the lights are the main event.

If you think about it, lights have a special way of drawing people in. They’re brilliant, beautiful, and filled with warmth – just like the Light of the world!

The true Light of Christmas has the awesome power and ability of shining truth and love into the most broken, grief-stricken, or hardened of hearts.
Jesus truly illuminates all that His love touches!

Do you feel discouraged or broken this Christmas season? I encourage you to seek Jesus with all your heart. Ask Jesus for His comfort and help. Even in our brokenness – especially through our brokenness – God’s light can shine through. In fact, God has an extra special place in His heart for the brokenhearted (Ps. 34:18).
As we allow God to bring His help, encouragement, comfort, and healing into our hearts, He then can use us to be a brilliant light…a true treasure..to others (2 Corinthians 1:3-5).

This Christmas season, ask Jesus to show you who needs to know and hear about His love and light!

Jesus is the Light of the World. What an incredible privilege to have 24/7 access to a close friendship with Him…and to show His beautiful light to others.

Ask Jesus to make you a bright light for His glory, and to light your path and guide your life. Jesus is faithful to shine through us…as we love others this Christmas season…and to show us His perfect will for us, too!

This Christmas season, let’s allow Christ’s light to draw us in and captivate us each and every day!

🙏🏻Prayer: “Jesus, thank You for being the Light of the World and shining Your brilliant light into our hearts! Thank You for making a way for each of us to know You intimately and for being our very best and most treasured Friend! This Christmas season, I pray You would show us opportunities to share Your life, love, and Light with others. Make our hearts sensitive and compassionate towards those around us who are hurting, and those who are in darkness, so we can shine Your light of hope into their life! We thank You for all You have done (and all You will do) in our lives and our loved ones’ lives this special Christmas season! We love and adore You! In Your precious name we pray, Amen!”

⭐️Activity: Invite your family or a loved one to wear Christmas pajamas and look at Christmas lights together. Talk about how Christ has changed your heart and life…share ways He has brought Light into your life! Also share with each other what Jesus is currently doing in your heart and life. Don’t forget the Christmas music (also be extra careful if driving and looking at lights😊). After you get back, watch a Christmas movie together.

Read: Psalms 34:18, John 8:12, James 1:17, John 1:9, Matthew 5:14-16, Psalms 36:9, 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

This devotional © 2018 by Kim Niles/Grief Bites. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️🦌🎄❤️

©2020 Kim Niles/Grief Bites. All rights reserved.

❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

⭐️For more encouragement:

❤️Making peace with God: http://www.peacewithgod.net

❤️Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s book): https://www.christianbook.com/getting-knocks-transparent-journey-seeking-through/k-b-h-niles/

❤️Connect on Facebook by “liking” page: https://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

❤️Kim’s blog: https://www.griefbites.com

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

1. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships

2. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed

3. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites

4. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays

5. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Christmas: http://bible.com/r/3V5

6. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Happy New Year!: http://bible.com/r/3Zv

7. Valentine’s Day: Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/14059-valentines-day-experiencing-holidays-with-jesus

⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is copyright protected material. Please ask for permission to copy, use, or print.

⭐️⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is for encouragement purposes only and is not in any way to be construed as medical, emotional, mental, relational, or psychological advice. We hope to serve as a bridge to encourage others by sharing our personal grief and life experiences. Please contact a qualified healthcare professional, mental health professional, or qualified pastor for guidance and advice.

Grief & Holidays ~ helpful tip #1

Throughout the next few weeks, I will be offering holiday tips that I hope will be encouraging and helpful to your heart.

After going through multiple family deaths, the holidays became a very painful and challenging time for my family and me.

As I share (in these next holiday posts) what my family and I have learned through the process of creating special, meaningful, and eventually enjoyable holidays again – in spite of grief – I hope all who read these helpful tips will be encouraged and comforted!

Grief can definitely make the holidays excruciatingly painful to get through…but there truly is hope.

Having experienced the death of family members on major holidays (Thanksgiving and Easter) and the day after Valentine’s Day and day before Christmas, I truly understand how challenging holidays can be.

To be honest, I never thought our family would ever have the ability to enjoy these particular holidays again…ever…but we finally were able to after navigating through tremendous grief.

My first holiday tip is:

Grieve how you need to grieve and be kind to your heart.

Do not put on yourself the extra pressure of having the “perfect” holidays.

Just like you are having to create a “new normal” in day-to-day life, you may need to create a “new holiday season” – or the freedom to do holidays differently for a season, too.

Creating a “new normal” doesn’t make anything “normal“…oh, how I hate that word…yet I like to compare “creating new normals” to inflating a life raft: it doesn’t make anything immediately better, but it can prevent a griever from completely drowning.

When going through grief, holidays can lose their previous joy, sparkle and specialness.

•Holiday meals can be excruciating since a much-loved family member is no longer here to enjoy loved ones, the meal, or the holiday. Their presence is sorely missed!

• Suddenly, the tree that used to shine bright holding treasured ornaments and memories can now bring about intense sadness.

• Baking treats and making favorite dishes you used to bake or make for a loved one who is no longer here can now bring about incredible heartache.

• Old familiar traditions can now bring intense pain or anxiety.

• Certain Christmas songs can be tied to a special memory, remind you of a loved one, or can bring sudden tears out of nowhere.

• And seeing happy couples and cheerful families—on social media or in real life—can bring about feelings of depression, hopelessness, anger, or maybe even envy.

The holidays can be a huge reminder of the great treasure you lost.

It is very painful navigating through the holidays when going through the death of a loved one, adultery or divorce, miscarriage/infertility, financial or job loss, family/marital/stepfamily conflict, physical or mental illness of a loved one, addiction issues, family rebellion or estrangement, illness, or other painful losses.

…And it can be extra painful and burdensome when family and friends do not understand or don’t agree with how you are handling your grief.

Explain to family and friends how the holidays are going to be tough on you and lovingly ask for their help, support, love, understanding and compassion.

Some grievers may be able to do all of their usual holiday traditions, while others may not…BOTH are perfectly fine!

Pray about and consider what you need to do, or not do, this holiday season and come to a place of peace about it.

It doesn’t mean it will always be like this…(just because you choose something this year doesn’t mean it will be cemented forever)…it simply means you are doing what you need to do THIS holiday season to make it through the holidays.

Communication is key! Talk about your plans and how you are feeling with your loved ones, to avoid hurt feelings or conflict.

Compromise may be needed when choosing what to do (and not do) during the holidays…but it is important to grieve however you need to grieve.

Ideally, it is best to come to decisions where your grief is genuinely honored…while also factoring in honoring your time with remaining loved ones.

Just like there is no such thing as “cookie cutter” grief, not every griever or family will handle the holidays the exact same way either. Each must communicate and find what’s best for their own individual family. It may include fully celebrating holidays as usual…or changing things up a little…or beginning a few new traditions…or completely changing everything this year…or going out of town, on a vacation, or to visit family who live out of town for a change of scenery. There are many ways to create a peaceful, meaningful holiday during times of grief.

If you have family and friends who love you, support you, and encourage you, what an amazing, incredible gift that truly is! Be sure to thank them for all of the ways they bring encouragement, meaning, and love to your life.

Grief is so unique and personal – and affects so many facets of your life – it isn’t a cookie-cutter experience. It’s a journey that is between God and you – and, at times, those you live with.

Grief isn’t designed for everyone to have input or an opinion about it.

…You don’t “get over it”…

…You can’t go around it…

…You can’t fly above it…

…You have to go through it…

…And there isn’t an ending to grief while on earth because grief will resurface from time to time. As long as there is love, grief will lovingly linger…because love doesn’t die.

Yes, grieve however you need to grieve and be kind to your heart. As long as you aren’t hurting yourself or others…and you’re not hurting the heart of God…your grief is totally appropriate.

I am praying everyone who is going through a sad or tough time will have a meaningful holiday season. And I truly hope everyone is surrounded by understanding and caring loved ones who will offer encouragement and kindness the next few weeks.

It can take time to find a new holiday normal, so please don’t be hard on yourself. It takes time, effort, and grace to work out a broken heart and to pick up the pieces of a shattered life.

Grief can be excruciatingly heartbreaking during the holidays, but through genuinely remembering and honoring your treasured deceased loved ones, honoring your grief, and showing love to your remaining loved ones – while working through your grief – holidays can hold great joy again…in time!

I wish each of you a peaceful Christmas season that is filled with comfort, encouragement, and hope.

With God’s help, the holidays can be meaningful again.

Gratitude & blessings,
Kim

©2015 by Kim Niles. All rights reserved.

🎄❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

⭐️For more encouragement:

❤️Making peace with God: http://peacewithgod.net

🎄Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s book): Click here for book

❤️Connect on Facebook by “liking” page: http://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

🎄Kim’s blog: http://www.griefbites.com

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

1. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships

2. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed

3. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites

4. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays

5. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Christmas, http://bible.com/r/3V5

6. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Happy New Year!: http://bible.com/r/3Zv

7. Valentine’s Day: Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/14059-valentines-day-experiencing-holidays-with-jesus

⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is copyright protected material. Please ask for permission to copy, use, or print.

⭐️⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is for encouragement purposes only and is not in any way to be construed as medical, emotional, mental, relational, or psychological advice. We hope to serve as a bridge to encourage others by sharing our personal grief and life experiences. Please contact a qualified healthcare professional, mental health professional, or qualified pastor for guidance.

Grief & Holidays—helpful tip #7

Christmas week carries so many tough emotions for those who are grieving. Emotions such as heartache, fear, anxiety, dread, and bittersweetness can be overwhelming. It’s so important to allow family and close friends to help you and comfort you.

Today’s tip for the holidays is:

Allow yourself the gift of receiving help, comfort, love, and encouragement.

  • Allow people to hug you
  • Allow others to help you through your grief 
  • Allow others to run errands for you
  • Allow others to spend time with you
  • Allow others to make the holiday dinner if you don’t feel up to it this year 
  • Allow others to help you send out thank you notes for any kindness others have done or do
  • Allow others to help you shop
  • Allow others to comfort and encourage you
  • Allow those closest to you to know how you’re truly feeling and doing

This is just a short list. Each person who grieves will know what they are comfortable – or uncomfortable – allowing others to do.

Grief is extremely hard work. Be kind to yourself and others – and know that nobody fully has grief all figured out. Grief is like a puzzle and each griever has to figure out what pieces to use so they can rebuild their heart, life, and traditions. One of the puzzle pieces is allowing others to help, comfort, encourage, and offer you their love, condolences, encouragement, and support.

Whatever help or encouragement you allow this holiday season, I truly hope your heart cared for and comforted.

May everybody have a blessed Christmas week!

Gratitude & blessings,
🎄Kim

©2015 by Kim Niles. All rights reserved.

❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

⭐️For more encouragement:

🎄Making peace with God: http://peacewithgod.net

❤️Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s book): Click here for book

⭐️Connect on Facebook by “liking” page: http://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

🎄Kim’s blog: http://www.griefbites.com

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

1. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships

2. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed

3. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites

4. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays

5. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Christmas: http://bible.com/r/3V5

6. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Happy New Year!: http://bible.com/r/3Zv

7. Valentine’s Day: Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/14059-valentines-day-experiencing-holidays-with-jesus

⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is copyright protected material. Please ask for permission to copy, use, or print.

⭐️⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is for encouragement purposes only and is not in any way to be construed as medical, emotional, mental, relational, or psychological advice. We hope to serve as a bridge to encourage others by sharing our personal grief and life experiences. Please contact a qualified healthcare professional, mental health professional, or qualified pastor for guidance and advice.

🎄❤️🎄