Tag Archive | guilt after a loved one dies

For all who are hurting and worn out…

Thinking of and praying for all who have a quiet ache in their heart today.

~ The ones who tell everyone they’re “fine” but nothing feels okay…


~The ones who deserved an apology yet never got one…


~The ones who smile and lift up others but nobody sees or lifts up their heavy heart…


~The ones who sacrificed and built a marriage, family, business, or relationship yet lost the dream they worked so hard for…


~The ones who are going through deep grief; who wake up feeling like there’s a silent funeral in their heart—yet are still trying to “live” in spite of the pain…


~The ones who battle trauma, deep wounds, suicidal thoughts, excruciating grief, or addictions yet quietly choose one more day of strength—each & every day…hour…minute…second…


~The ones who choose & make time for their loved ones but aren’t being chosen…


~The ones who lost their “world” as they navigate staying in the workd without them…


~The ones who have been hurt, wronged, neglected, rejected, and mistreated by their spouse, kiddos, and family yet remain steadfast in their love, kindness, & loyalty to keep the marriage or family together…


~The ones who tried so hard and did everything in their power to prevent a loved one from dying…or help a loved one through mental, emotional, health, or addiction challenges…or tried to prevent grief, pain, trauma, generational sin, or bad events — yet the unthinkable happened…or were left feeling helpless…


~The ones who were betrayed yet have remained kind, loyal, and faithful…


~The ones who others & life tried to break but they continue to get back up…


~The ones who feel worn before they even get out of bed yet keep pressing forward…


~The ones who keep going in spite of life not turning out how they thought it’d be—how it should’ve been…

I want you to know:
You are seen.
You are worthy of being heard.
You are so valuable!
You are incredibly loved!
I’m glad you are here! So are your loved ones!

Thank you for choosing to stay here on earth…for choosing strength when it’s easier to quit…for never giving up.
The world is a better place because of your beautiful heart!

It won’t always be like this.
It won’t always feel like this.

It won’t be or feel as bad as it is today.

Whatever is hurting & weighing your heart down, please know someone cares.


I’m praying for ALL of the Grief Bites family, my family, & friends today!
You are a treasure!

I pray your best days are to come.💕

Love,
Kim

By the way…

God WILL reward you for all of the goodness, kindness, love, investment, loyalty, & encouragement you have poured & comtimue to pour into others…He WILL be making up for all you have experienced…for everything that has broken your heart.🥰🙏🏻

©2025 Grief Bites. All rights reserved.

❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

⭐️For more encouragement:

❤️Making peace with God: http://www.peacewithgod.net

❤️Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s book): https://www.christianbook.com/getting-knocks-transparent-journey-seeking-through/k-b-h-niles/

❤️Connect on Facebook by “following” our page: https://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

❤️Kim’s blog: https://www.griefbites.com

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

  1.  The True Treasure of Christmas:  https://www.bible.com/en/reading-plans/28852
  2. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays
  3. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Christmas: http://bible.com/r/3V5
  4. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships
  5. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed
  6. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites
  7. Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: Happy New Year!: http://bible.com/r/3Zv
  8. Valentine’s Day: Experiencing Holidays With Jesus: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/14059-valentines-day-experiencing-holidays-with-jesus

⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is copyright protected material. Please ask for permission to copy, use, or print. 

⭐️⭐️All content on the Grief Bites blog and website is for encouragement purposes only and is not in any way to be construed as medical, emotional, mental, relational, or psychological advice. We hope to serve as a bridge to encourage others by sharing our personal grief and life experiences. Please contact a qualified healthcare professional, mental health professional, or qualified pastor for guidance and advice.

The Dark Candle ~ Resolving Guilt After The Death Of A Loved One

When someone you greatly love and cherish dies, life can be a challenge.

A challenge to find joy again.

A challenge not to cry every day.

A challenge to enjoy others.

A challenge to relax by doing your previous favorite activities.

A challenge to figure out how to live life at all.

After my sister passed away, life became a true challenge. I felt absolutely horrible guilt that I couldn’t help her…that I didn’t notice how sick she truly was…that we had a bad argument a few months before she passed away…that I was so busy preparing for thanksgiving that I didn’t visit her the few days she was in the hospital.

My sister and I were extremely close; in fact, she was my best friend. The heartache and intense guilt I felt after she died plagued my heart for years. As I cried out to God to help me through my grief…and to release me from the unrelenting guilt and pain…God was so good to answer my prayers.

My life and the way I process grief has never been the same since.

As I was seeking God for His help, a thought came into my heart, “Your sister doesn’t hold anything against you. What may have bothered her on earth, does not even remotely bother her in Heaven. She knows how much you love her, and she knows if you would have known how ill she was, you would’ve come to the hospital. She loves you and she forgives you. Your sister loved life! She’d want you to enjoy and love life, too, so do so in her honor.”

After sensing this in my heart, my eyes flooded with tears. Ever since that day, I have truly tried my best to celebrate life, love my family, and honor my sister and other loved ones to my greatest ability.

When grief enters your life, you are left to work through all of the tough emotions. You grieve not just the person, instead you grieve every facet of that person and all they meant to you. And it takes time.

I’d like to share a story with you. As you read the following story, keep in mind that during grief, there will be tears – absolutely! – they are a very normal and healthy part of grief. And you don’t always have control of when grief will hit you since grief is much like the ocean’s water…sometimes the water is calm and beautiful, but other times, the water is extremely rocky and torrential.

As you read this story, listen to your heart and truly know that your loved one loves you so very much! They love you for all the ways you loved and cared for them while they were here on earth…and they treasure and love you for all of the ways you honor and remember them daily. They hold nothing against you…they wish you love, peace, comfort, and joy.

I hope this story brings your heart the comfort and peace you so desperately deserve. May God bring your heart healing, love, and all of the good things that life has to offer! You’re going to make it through this!

❤️Gratitude & blessings,
    Kim

The Dark Candle

A man had a little daughter – an only and much beloved child. He lived for her ~ she was his life. So when she became ill and her illness resisted the efforts of the best obtainable physicians, he became like a man possessed, moving heaven and earth to bring about her restoration to health. 

His best efforts proved unavailing and the child died. The father was totally irreconcilable. He became a bitter recluse, shutting himself away from his many friends and refusing every activity that might restore his poise and bring him back to his normal self. But one night he had a dream. He was in Heaven, and was witnessing a grand pageant of all the little child angels. They were marching in an apparently endless line past the Great White Throne. Every white-robed angelic tot carried a candle. He noticed that one child’s candle was not lighted. Then he saw that the child with the dark candle was his own little girl. Rushing to her, while the pageant faltered, he seized her in his arms, caressed her tenderly, and then asked: “How is it, darling that your candle alone is unlighted? His sweet daughter lovingly replied, “Father, they often relight it, but your tears always put it out.” 

Just then he awoke from his dream. The lesson was crystal clear, and its effects were immediate. From that hour on he was not a recluse, but mingled freely and cheerfully with his former friends and associates. No longer would his little darling’s candle be extinguished by his useless tears.

Written by Strickland Gillian

I pray this story brought comfort and great encouragement to your heart. May God bless you today and always!

❤️If you were encouraged by this post, please feel free to share it to encourage others!

For more encouragement:

❤️Making peace with God: http://peacewithgod.net

❤️Kim’s blog: http://www.griefbites.com

❤️Connect on Facebook by “liking” page: http://www.facebook.com/GettingYourBreathBackAfterGrief

❤️Getting Your Breath Back After Life Knocks It Out of You (Kim’s book): Click here for book

❤️FREE YouVersion reading plans:

1. Grief Bites: Finding Treasure In Hardships: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/912-grief-bites-finding-treasure-in-hardships 

2. Grief Bites: Doubt Revealed: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/954-grief-bites-doubt-revealed 

3. Grief Bites: A New Approach To Growing Through Grief https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/862-grief-bites 

4. Grief Bites: Hope For The Holidays: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/1964-grief-bites-hope-for-the-holidays